“life will be better in spring”

April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011

I should have done that
I should have ignored it
like something i couldn't see
I shouldn't have looked at you at all
I should have run away
I should have acted like i didn't hear it
like something I couldn't hear.
I shouldn't have listened to love at all

Without a word , you let me know love
Without a word, you give me love
You made me even hold your breath but you ran away like this
Without a word, love leaves me
Without a word, love tossed me away
what should I say next?
my closed lips were surprised on their own
coming without any words

Why does it hurts so much?
Why does it hurts continuously ?
Except for the fact that i can't see you anymore
And that you are not here anymore
Otherwise, it's the same as before.

Without a word , you let me know love
Without a word, you give me love
You made me even hold of your breath but you ran away like this
Without a word, love leaves me
Without a word, love tossed me away
What should I say next?
My closed lips were surprised on their own
Without a word, tears fall
Without a word, my heart breaks down.

Without a word, i waited for love
Without a word, love hurts me
I zoned out. I become a fool because I cry looking at the sky
Without a word, firewell finds me
Without a word, the end comes to me
I think my heart was surprised to send you away without any preperations
It came without a word.

Without a word, it comes and leaves
Like the fever before
Maybe all I need to do is endure the hurt for a while
Because in the end, only scars are left.



went to BPS and watched them train today. bored ttm. but the training looks tough. i always feel so useless sitting down there. zzz. it's like i'm there but i'm not there. drank koi today. realised i'm weighing 51.4kg now. epic. i'm dead.

today's episode of You're Beautiful is so saddening. ):

you know sometimes there'll be this situation when you just don't feel like talking to people cos you're feeling low and then people just keep talking to you? it's okay if they understand you or share some common opinions. but when they don't, it really feels very very annoying. yeah i know i should appreciate them, but sometimes i really just want to be left alone. so in the end, people think i'm throwing tantrum, giving attitude. zzz what crap.

Day 10.
i can't do anything else other than trying to stop thinking about him right.