so last night's dream came true. i wasn't informed that there's training, and i missed the training. wow i feel so proud i can predict future. tsk. if judo isn't important to you, it doesn't mean it's also unimportant to me. why must it always be me. and how fking hell is it always me. i'm sure i haven't received anything from you before 9pm just now. how am i fucking supposed to face/treat you after all these? no mood for judo training anymore. guess it's too much of a fantasy for me to want to perfect a throw. yeah just dream on, it'll at least happen in your dream.